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[02 Dec 2006|09:07pm] |
i hate waking up and feeling like i do. everyday, it never changes...and never will, unless of course God intervenes. it sucks but it's a part of life i guess, well my life anyways, and though i accept it a little more everyday...everyday it gets a little harder to deal with, a bit harder to ignore.
i knew this would happen...and it's gonna turn out to be my fault
maybe not, we'll see
i want to see a blanket of snow, i want to go snowboarding...i want to get in my car, crank up the heat, and hate my life because it takes too long to work & it's so dang cold! that's my christmas wish.
i hate emo people...ha
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[27 Nov 2006|12:21am] |
the more i go to work...the more i never want to work again
the more i relax...the more my back hurts
weird?
story time
so i'm listening to christmas music...and carol of the bells comes on but i leave it, i listen to it...i love that song!
what?
why is my life so random?
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[24 Jun 2006|04:13pm] |
i want an aaron, ben, billy, and jordan sandwich real bad!
being on the park doesn't feel right without them
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| DUDE!!! |
[15 Apr 2006|02:15am] |
accident #1: june 25, 2005 - driving along, get rear-ended by a drunk driver and rammed into another car. ended with two totalled vehicles and one savable
accident #2: march 4, 2006 - driving along, some guy pulls out in front of me, stops and sits there as i hit him. ended with at least one totalled vehicle...don't know about the other one
accident #3: april 14, 2006 - riding along (with kembra driving), she thought it was clear, makes a turn, we get "T-boned" and the other car hit a third one. ended with three totalled vehicles and zero savable
for those taking notes...that's three accidents for me in less than a year and about six totalled vehicles
moral of the story: im cursed, don't let me drive/ride in your car because it will probably end up totalled
that's all i got
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[17 Feb 2006|03:33pm] |
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the nothing talks...dude, you don't even know, but you wish you did
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[10 Sep 2005|12:28am] |
it's quite humbling
words can't explain it
TV doesn't do it justice
to fully understand it
you'd really have to see it with your own eyes
we were lucky
nothing else to say
*a little more than a week*
time has literally flown by
-jordan-
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[28 Jul 2005|05:30pm] |
best flippin news in about a month = physical therapist said he thinks all the pain i have is from muscles being too tight in a certain area and no surgery will be needed :D and if thats true, that means no problems down the road either...and also, if thats true that means all i have to do is complete my physical therapy and then find a job and i'll be back, and i only have like nine more visits for PT :D...AND i'm getting my MRI done on monday = maybe i can see the doctor next week and see if all is well
when i hug her, even in public, i don't have to let go right away...she lets me hold her as long as i want
*can't wait to come back..soon, and very soon :)*
-jordan-
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| there's no room to fail |
[14 Jul 2005|08:45pm] |
God is amazing...
but i'll never understand Him...
and the more i try to...
the more i realize...
i can't see past tomorrow.
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[28 Jun 2005|05:31pm] |
so...today woke up and went to the attorney's office, not much of a story there...then we went out a-lookin for possible new cars/trucks for me...i saw a couple civics, both in pretty bad shape...saw my old car, not my actual car, but a '97 manual escort. i just had to take it for a drive, and it felt good...brought back memories, well one, me losing to chris's cavalier. others too, but that one stuck out...then i found the truck i would love to call my new baby, she's a '97 manual deisel ford f-350 dualie, it was a flippin monster, but it'll run me about $11,000 :/...the other one was a '99 dakota with a V8 318 motor, it needs a little lift and body work but other than that a beauty, it'll run me about $6,000...and the drunk guy's insurance called me and said they'd give me $5926.19, and believe it or not thats more than we paid for her...i hate to see her go, but she put up a heck of a fight
i got my amp the other day...its a beast of an amp, well more so than anything i've ever had seein how the only one i had got drained out by my computer...haha
thats it
-jordan-
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[27 Jun 2005|11:54pm] |
( two silverados...head-to-butt. )
so i didn't get to go to cornerstone cuz my flippin dormant injuries could escalate or w/e and my boss is afraid i'll claim workman's comp...so he said no cornerstone and i shouldn't come in to work for a while...i need flippin money dogg...pisses me off
other than that im good...a month and a half left of class...heck yeah
thats all for now
-jordan
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[25 Jun 2005|04:12pm] |
the last sayurday of every month we have class from 8-4 give or take, and today was that day...i made some samiches last night for my lunch today cuz i can't eat out (too expensive) and i had like four gatorades with me so i wouldn't get dehydrated or whatever. so i got up at like 7 and i figured on the way i'd stop by the gas station and get one of those foam coolers to put my stuff in...did that, put the cooler in the bed of my truck and left...first turn i make, everything goes flying so i stop when i can put the gatorades back in the cooler and packed some ice in then brought it in the cab with me, i left my tailgate down so all the loose ice would fall out instead of sitting in my bed. so i get on the interstate on my way to class, take the normal exit to switch interstates, and on that exit this guy was in front of me and couldn't really keep it on the road, so when we got off the exit i pass him thinking he just can't drive, no big deal...bout a mile up there's construction and it one lane and also another exit merging into the interstate, so traffic slows to about 15-20 mph and it turns out "mr. can't drive" was drunk...he didn't slow down at all, and rear-ended me going about 70 mph...throws me forward into a tiny car, then the fruitcake hits me again and again i'm thrown ahead into the tiny little car...then this queer bait runs, he gets in the closed lane and takes off...but since my tailgate was down it tore up his grille and smashed his engine so he only got about 1/4 down...so then he gets out and runs through the woods. the damage he did to my truck was bent frame, the bed of my truck jammed into the back of my cab and completely shattered my back window, my radio flew out of my dashboard, my seat went into the backseat, and it goes on and on...pretty much totalled it. the car in front of me was an elderly couple that just bought a brand new mercury montego and the lady had just had a complete knee replacement and it was bothering her, other than that no one was hurt...but considereing the damage done to my truck and his truck, if he had hit the car, they would been hurt bad...and if my tailgate wasn't down it wouldn't have done near as much damage to his truck and he would've got away
i see it as a good thing in a way...cuz i thought about putting the cooler in the cab to begin with, and i just didn't...had i not stopped, there wouldn't have been any cars between him and that car and he would've sandwhiched them into an 18-wheeler...and had i not left my tailgate down, he would've ran. it all kinda worked out perfectly, tho i am out of a vehicle and i loved my truck...in a way, it was worth it
drunk drivers are the devil
-jordan-
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[18 Jun 2005|06:59pm] |
awesome flippin day
first thing this morning me and my dad go to pick up my brother from the bus station in mississippi (he came to get his car) and he brought my future sister-in-law (yeah...he's gettin married next febuary)...then we came home, i gave him a little lesson in how to drive a stick, ha...then we went to applebees and then off to six flags...that was fun. so then we come home, change and head out to play ball at the gym...in case you were wondering, we tore it up...so much so that they got mad cuz a couple white boys that "can't play ball" showed a bunch of black guys how to play the game. they even played little school girl ball where if they got touched they called a foul, but me and rick still had a session of summer school going...haha (sorry, old ball trash talk coming back a bit) so anyways, they got to arguing so much me and him started laughing and left it at that.
so we still have the rest of the day today and all day tomorrow...and it really feels good, cuz before today i hadn't seen him in three years.
i'll post later...maybe tomorrow night
-jordan-
*i miss it...alot*
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[16 Jun 2005|11:04pm] |
long time
today was a bad flippin day
i wish i was snowboarding right now
i miss everyone up north
exactly two months til i finish class
nothing else to say really...
*you have no idea*
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[24 May 2005|09:35pm] |
it's too flippin hott here...seriously, i go outside and just sittin on my back porch in the shade doin my homework and i got too hot in like five minutes...sucks major donkey balls
other than that, things are goin about as well as they can...found out my bro isn't moving so we can get a place when i do get back AWOOHOO! and firefighting is goin good. had a test last night that i think i flippin tore apart. and we're actually gettin into hands on stuff...kinda. i get more and more excited everyday when i think about "emika", and i can't wait ("emika" is the code name for the tubular super flippin sweet awesome mondo band aaron and i will start upon my return to MI) we haven't actually picked out a name for it, so until we do, that's what i'll call it cuz i like it.
-jordan-
im not gonna lie...it sucked, but if the mail-man can make it through rain, hail, sleet, and snow...i can build my bridge
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[16 May 2005|03:18am] |
it's still kinda hard to believe that i got to go to michigan
it was flippin awesome, and i needed it a lot...got to see everyone, but i didn't get to hang out with all the people i wanted to...but it was weird cuz it kinda just seemed like i had never left? don't know how to explain it...and i discovered i have a slight stutter, haha...leaving was hard tho, i stalled as long as i could, but i had to go :/
i miss it already, i missed it before i even left...and i miss everyone there, but i'll be back before long...actually going up there kinda made me want to go back sooner than september, which means i wouldn't finish my class...don't know if thats a good thing or a bad thing, just a feeling i thought i'd let ya in on
that's all i got
-jordan-
i miss you...more than ever, already
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[04 May 2005|05:02pm] |
decisions...
so today was pretty good. went to work, it wasn't too bad, then came home early cuz i have a test tonight in class...just started a new flipping section on monday and we have a test tonight. it's supposed to be hard, but i'm still gonna exercize my "never study" philosophy and see how it goes. oh. and we have a new instructor for this section of class, and he made it wuite clear that we will not get out before ten'o'clock, before we'd get out early between eight-thirty and nine'o'clock or so. anyways, that's a lot of time to be in class. i got a call for an interview at a grocery store, i think i may get a job there for weekends or w/e, but we'll see.
do you ever get so happy, sad, lonely, loved, helpless, or caring (i can't think of anymore feelings...so thats it) not all at once, but one so much that you don't think there's any way anyone else could know what it feels like, and then when you least expect it a song comes on the radio putting exactly how you feel into words. but it's not a song you've heard before, not even that you just weren't paying attention to it and now you are...but that it's literally brand new to you...does that ever happen to anyne else? happened to me a few weeks ago. "home" by michael buble, completely explains what i feel right now and have been feeling. i'm not gonna put it in here cuz i feel like thats all i ever do, so look it up if you want.
so i had a softball game with the church last night, i'm doin a lot better seein how i haven't played since i was in 6th grade or so...and i'm gettin more and more into it and actually starting to like baseball a bit, used to hate it, so thats a step up for me. last night i wore red flower shorts and a guy on another team had on blue ones and he got upset that mine were "louder" than his, then he told me it was on and he'd get louder shorts and beat me...haha, i thought it was kinda funny. what was even funnier is when i went up to bat they saw the little skinny kid and called their guys in to play close, they pitch...WHACK! i hit it right between them and they were playing so close they couldn't get to it so it went all the way to the fence...yae yae, only got to third...but it felt good to do that to 'em
*random* day old popcorn is so good...i had some last night
that's it
-jordan-
i miss you
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| IF WE ARE THE BODY |
[01 May 2005|03:25pm] |
it's crowded in worship today
as she slips in trying to fade into the faces
the girls teasing laughter is carrying farther than they know
...farther than they know
but if we are the body
why aren't His arms reaching?
why aren't His hands healing?
why aren't His words teaching?
and if we are the body
why aren't His feet going?
why is His love not showing them there is a way?
...there is a way
a traveler is far away from home
he sheds his coat and quietly sinks into the back row
the weight of their judgmental glances
tells him that his chances are better out on the road
but if we are the body
why aren't His arms reaching?
why aren't His hands healing?
why aren't His words teaching?
and if we are the body
why aren't His feet going?
why is His love not them that there is a way?
...there is a way
Jesus paid much too high a price
for us pick and choose who should come
and we are the body of Christ
but if we are the body
why aren't His arms reaching?
why aren't His hands healing?
why aren't His words teaching?
and if we are the body
why aren't His feet going?
why is His love not showing them there is a way?
...there is a way...Jesus is the way
*Casting Crowns*
i love that song...it's powerful
-jordan-
i miss you
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[24 Apr 2005|02:43am] |
i've been missing it a lot up north lately...like i was "ok" for a while and then it hit me pretty hard again last week sometime...four more months, about that...but then again, now i need to get a really good job seein how chris is leaving for a year, or find someone else to live with?...
anyways...im takin the last test for the EMT section of fireman school tomorrow...then we start actually learning about firefighting :) that'll be fun...but i still haven't even got to meet smokey the bear, i was really hoping i'd get to :/
thats about it...short post, but i can't think of anything else
-jordan-
i miss you
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| COME TOMORROW |
[17 Apr 2005|12:21am] |
where will you be, come tomorrow?
will you leave me never to be seen again,
or come tomorrow, will you stand tall next to me as always?
what will i face, come tomorrow?
is getting out of bed even considered a trial,
or come tomorrow, will i actually show up to do some work?
who will i be, come tomorrow?
the guy afraid to make a difference,
or come tomorrow, will i have the strength to hold your hand?
how will i make it, come tomorrow?
lay low and try to stay undetected,
or come tomorrow, will you guide me along the path made for me?
why will i change, come tomorrow?
because today i'm too afraid to give "me" up,
or come tomorrow, will i finally realize all you've done for me?
when will i wake, come tomorrow?
with the alarm at six, hitting snooze til nine,
or come tomorrow, will i take my last breath before the alarm sounds?
come tomorrow, will tomorrow come?
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[13 Apr 2005|10:27pm] |
i just watched the cruelest, most disturbing thing ever...it's how they get fur for clothes
~if you don't want to see it at all~
basically they have this racoon looking animal (except he doesn't have stripes or w/e)...so they pick him up by the hind legs and bash his head into the ground a couple times, then they hang him upside down and skin him alive...the animal squirms with pain and they just keep tugging and tugging on the fur from the butt towards the head...his skin is completely inside out and finally detaches from the front legs and head so they take him down and the video showed the animal laying on the ground, skinless and bloody, rubbing his head against his front leg trying to soothe the pain and finally rolling over and dying
~if you want to see it for yourself~
http://www.petatv.com/tvpopup/video.asp?video=fur_farm&Player=wm&speed=_med
yeah im definitely against fur clothes now...i mean i know they're just animals, and they don't have "feelings" like us, but that's just cruel...i kept picturing my dog up there like that (even tho she's not exactly "fur material" she'd feel that just the same)
i don't even know what else to say...im done
-jordan-
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